From Cocoon to butterfly

Thank you all for your comments on my blog. I try to be honest with how I feel and dwelve into my thoughts. Things are going well for me here and tomorrow is my official weigh in. Hoping for a good one so that next week I can get my next avi!! Everytime I look at my weight ticker, I really do have a hard time beleiving it is mine. It has been so long since I have seen anything even near 200 and now I am in the 170’s! Still hard to be accustomed to but it is a nice thing though. All my family is gone right now and I have the house to myself , ahhh. They are going to the countryside to visit the relatives and honestly, I hate to go. I do go every now and then for curtosy sake but I really don’t like to go. What are my plans today? Well, I am thinking of watching a movie and then a nice bath and shampoo and thne a nap. Sounds good to me when your baby gets up at 4am wanting to play!

Being married really opens up your eyes to how men think although I don’t think I ever will understand them. One night my husband was talking quite frankly about his feelings about me losing weight. He loves it, no doubt and certain, ahem, things are muchj better but he admitted that he is a little bit fearful also of my body. He is so use to me being really padded everywhere that now, when he touches me, a lot of that padding is gone and now he is starting to feel my bones come out and he doesn’t know what to think about that. He likes that I am thinner but he says the changes in my body are happening more and more and he struggles iwth keeping up and getting use to him. He doesn’t want me to quit but he says he is a little fearful of what I may look and feel like once I reach goal. Mostly, fear that i WILl lose most of my breasts. I admit, they have shrunk a great deal and when you are already a b, that doesn’t look good. But I told him he had to make a choice, breasts and fat or less on top but thin. YOu know of course he wants me thin but he says it will just take a bit of getting use to. I told him not to worry because right now the changes are pretty rapid, especially on my top but I told him he will get use to it and not to worry. So like my title says, men are strange. I do know he likes me getting thinner. He compliments me so much now, very touchie and likes to always embrace me now. I like that although I wish my weight would not play such a part with his desires but he is a man after all, that is how they are hard wired.  Plus, I’ll admit, I feel better about myself with it.